New Voices columnist Amy Idem, originally from a small market town in Lancashire, is now living with her husband and three children, in Idil, in Turkey’s south eastern province of Şırnak. She writes about her cultural and life experiences here, and on her blog:

https://memyselfandidil.wordpress.com/

AS I sit in the poppy fields behind our apartments, watching our three children pick flowers and play happily in the open air, I think to myself that I made the right choice to move here.

It wasn’t an easy decision three years ago at the tender age of 18 to leave my family and the small town in Lancashire in which I had lived in all my life, to relocate to somewhere I had never even visited before.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and I truly believe that if I had visited İdil before moving, I would have flatly refused to live my life in what at first seems to be such a dull and uninteresting place.

Although I say it wasn’t an easy decision, it was a decision that was somewhat taken out of our hands by the settlement visa requirements for the UK. We didn’t and probably would never meet the standards that they set. If we wanted to be together as a family, we had to live in Turkey.

I wouldn’t describe myself as a ‘home bird’, I always expected that one day I would move to Turkey.

I pictured myself relaxing on the balcony with an ice cold soda in hand, looking out to sea. I imagined that we would settle in Altınkum or Bodrum, my husband would work in a hotel as he always had done and I would stay at home with the children. Taking them for outings to the beach and mixing with other expats.

The reality is somewhat different.

We live in İdil, Şırnak, about as far removed from a tourist area as you can get. We live in a ground floor apartment with no balcony and the nearest beach is 10 hours away by bus.

I am the only expat living in our town and in the surrounding areas foreigners are few and far between.

When I set foot in İdil, I couldn’t quite believe this is where I would be living. I had gotten used to the familiar Migros, Özsüt, LC Waikiki and other big Turkish brand names. We have none of those here.

I felt like I was in a different country, a completely unknown land. Although I had a basic grasp of Turkish, I only knew a few words in my husband’s native Kurmanji and I wasn’t confident in my ability to pronounce those correctly.

Those first few days were surreal: I felt like I was living someone elses life, detached from what was going on around me and a lot of the time I found myself wishing to be anywhere but here.

I must have kissed a hundred cheeks in those first few days alone, everyone wanted to see the family’s new foreign bride.

I sat with a smile plastered on my face as they spoke about me in a language I couldn’t understand, counting down the minutes until I didn’t have to pretend anymore.

My husband assured me that I would get used to being here, that I just needed time to adjust to my new surroundings and way of life.

I can’t say that I had confidence in what he was saying, but I nodded my agreement and prayed that he was right.

I can confirm now that my husband was indeed telling the truth when he told me I just needed time. In 3 years I have adjusted fully and I learn something new everyday.

And though once upon a time I never imagined that I could be happy here, no matter what happens in the future, wherever we end up, a part of my heart will always be in İdil.

I hope you enjoyed what is just the beginning of my long journey from hating to falling in love with Turkey. I look forward to sharing the rest of my story with you all and I hope you look forward to it too.